The Other Draconiquus
by survivorofgallopfrey
Summary: This is the story of a draconiquus known as L, as Twilight Sparkle knew him. L doesn't use his powers to cause chaos and ruin in Equestria, but rather to protect it from chaos and ruin. He is the arch-nemesis of Discord, and is obsessed with Doctor Who. These are the many adventures Twilight has had with this strange draconiquus who won't even reveal his name.
1. Prologue

Prologue

This is the story of a mare named Twilight Sparkle.

Or rather, this is the story of somepony else, as Twilight Sparkle knew them, and the strange course of events that occurred in her life because she knew them.

When Twilight was a little filly, she had no interest in making any friends besides her own brother, Shining Armor. She was more interested in immersing herself in books, and putting an unhealthy effort into building up her magical abilities. It was because of this "eggheaded" behavior that she became Princess Celestia's favorite protégée, and later alicorn princess.

One day, she was sent to Ponyville by the princess, ordered to make some friends. She was very reluctant to do so, but, after discovering that she and five other ponies represented the elements of harmony, and defeating a powerful foe, she accepted them as her friends.

One other day, they had to save the order of Equestria from the tyranny of a chaotic god, named Discord. Discord was a draconiquus, a creature with a body made up of an assortment of animals.

Twilight Sparkle never mentioned it to her friends, but once, when she was a little filly, she had what she thought was a dream, about having met a different draconiquus. Her parents and brother all believed that this was simply an imaginary friend she had come up with after reading too much mythology.

They could not have been more mistaken.

For this draconiquus is the non-pony, of which this story is about.

This is the story of a draconiquus known as L, as Twilight Sparkle knew him.

Not much is known about L, except that this single draconiquus's enigmatic initial has appeared in many conspiracy theories about the events in Equestria's history, and claiming that he is Princess Celestia's greatest secret ally. This is probably why so much of Equestria's history is virtually unknown to the general public.

Many of these conspiracies have him show up whenever the planet is in danger of extraterrestrial encounters/invasions, and leads Equestria to the path that would allow it to see another day.

Because Twilight Sparkle has no interest in conspiracies, she, like many other ponies, has been spending her life utterly blind to the truth that would have been so blatantly obvious otherwise, despite having met L in person.

This story depicts her dealings with L from beginning to end of her chronology.


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter one

It begins one night, when Twilight was seven years old, and her parents and brother had to be somewhere important, but they hired a foal sitter to watch her. This was before Princess Cadence was Twilight's favorite foal sitter, so there was always someone new every time.

This one in particular was late in showing up, as it had already been 15 minutes since her parents and sibling had left and still no sign of her anywhere.

Twilight was passing the time waiting by reading a book on the mythology and legends of the Draconiquui (what awful things it said about how they treated ponies), when suddenly she felt a strong cold breeze coming from inside the living room, which was blowing on the pages of the book, making her loose her focus on it. She looked in the direction of the breeze, knowing that she didn't leave a window open anywhere, when she saw a rather bizarre sight.

A large blue box was in the corner of the room, but in some kind of state between being there and not being there at all, and yet in the process of materializing. There was an odd vwoomp vwoomp noise as it came into being.

When it was fully solid, Twilight went up to it to get a better look at it. It was had two handles on one side, as though they were doors that opened up. On one of these doors, had a sign, which read PULL TO OPEN. At the top of each side of the box read the words POLICE PUBLIC CALL BOX.

Twilight was about to attempt to open the door, when it opened from the inside. In the wrong direction. And out came, a draconiquus.

"Hello, Twilight Sparkle!" he exclaimed. "I'm your foal sitter for tonight! You can call me, 'L'. " He paused. "Where are your parents? I was hoping to see them off before they left. What time is it? Did they leave already?"

This particular draconiquus had the head of a blue pony, with strangely normal pony eyes, although one is pink and the other is yellow, a green curly mess of a mane, no beard, no fangs sticking out of his mouth (unusual for a draconiquus, judging from what her book said), one ear of a rabbit, the other matched his pony head, and no horns. His left arm was the left foreleg of a leopard, his right arm was the right foreleg of an iguana, tail of a fox, and both wings appeared to be those of a dragon, both red fingered and purple membrane. Over his torso he wore a coat made up of mismatched fabrics, an undershirt, which equally didn't match, a bow tie, which also didn't match, over his legs he wore pants which also didn't match with everything else. On each hoof he wore very peculiarly shaped shoes.

Twilight was too surprised and afraid to move or respond.

"Hey, are you okay?" he asked her.

"You... you're... you're a..." she sputtered.

L reached down and zipped her mouth shut. Literally. "Let me stop you right there. Before you get under the impression that I want anything bad to happen to you, and that you should be afraid of me, I'm going to tell you this right now. I am NOT your enemy, Twilight. I don't want to do anything bad to you, Twilight, nor anypony else for that matter. I'm not like those others that you have read about in that book."

He snapped his fingers and the book appeared in his leopard paw, and he read aloud the title: "Draconiquui: the Myth and Their Horrible Treatment of Ponies. I must say that the Draconiquui have changed their ways since the last time they had any contact with ponykind. We no longer wish to throw your world into chaos, or enslave you. Instead, today I have come here, to your home, in an attempt to make peace between us. If ponies can see for themselves that we're not complete monsters anymore, and can actually be very responsible and logical beings, they'd be more willing to negotiate with us to bring about peace between our kinds. Do you understand? I know you can't speak right now with your mouth zipped up and all but just nod if you mean yes."

Twilight nodded frantically. L bent down and unzipped her lips. She took a deep breath, and exhaled.

"Just give me a chance, Twilight. If I fail, if tonight doesn't go as well as I had hoped, or the negotiations are unsuccessful, at the very least let's be able to say we gave it a good effort."

"Sure, but would you mind telling me as to how your kind survived their supposed extinction so many years ago?"

"Extinction? Hardly. But before we get into that, have you eaten already? Are you hungry?"

"Not really. We had dinner already before my parents and Shining Armor left."

"Well then, let me rephrase that question." He snapped his fingers and had teleported into the dining room, a bunch of tea pots and tea cups placed out sporadically on the table. He was now wearing a sick green coat, a dark green undershirt, a blue bow tie, dull green pants, brown worn out shoes, and a green top hat with a large tag with the size, 10/6, still attached. "Would you care for a cup of tea?" he asked as he poured the tea into one of his ear, which the sweet brown refreshment came out the other, and landed poured into a tea cup being held in his opposite hand.

"Um, sure. I suppose I could go for that." She walked over to the table and sat on one of the cushions, and poured herself a cup with her bare hooves.

"Um, you're a unicorn, right? Why don't you use your magic to levitate the teapot?"

"I'm still a little filly, silly. I haven't much mastery over my magic just yet."

"Oh, that makes sense, I suppose. And speaking of making sense, how about something that doesn't? A riddle. Why is a raven like a writing desk?"

Twilight was delighted by the prospect of having something to use her brain power to figure out, that she wasted no time in getting to it. After several minutes, she said, "I give up. Why is a raven like a writing desk?"

To this, L responded: "Because there is a B in 'both' and an N in 'neither'."

Twilight blinked three times before responding. "I think I might have misheard you on that one."

"No, you heard me correct. I told you before that riddle doesn't make sense. It's actually a riddle that has a question but no official answer. People have been coming up with many of their own answers to it. If you want one that actually makes sense, but is a bit meta of an author whose work hasn't been officially published in Equestria yet: 'Because Poe wrote on both.' "

"People?"

"Another species, who refer to themselves as people."

"Oh. And how can a riddle with no answer be so popular?"

"That is EXACTLY the reason why it's so popular! Plus it was written in a popular children's book called Alice in Wonderland. And... Oh, how silly of me! Alice in Wonderland was never published in Equestria. Every reference I make to it is completely lost on you, isn't it?"

"Pretty much."

L considered a thought for a moment. "Wait right here," he then said to her. "I'll be back in five minutes or less." He then waked into his blue box, pushing the door open instead of pulling it like the sign says to.

Twilight waited for a few minutes, and then L came back out of his box holding a small volume, titled: "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" by Lewis Carol. On the cover there was a strange creature, standing on two legs, wearing a blue and white dress, with a blonde mane, and digits on its front hooves. It was looking at a large grinning cat curled up on a tree branch.

"How would you like for me to read you a story, Twilight? Now, before you say anything about preferring to read it yourself, I must inform you that you have never truly experienced a story until you have heard it read aloud by a Draconiquus. You'll be glad that I was reading it aloud. I guarantee it."

"Alright."

L opened the book to the first page and began to read aloud:

"Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank, and of having nothing to do: once or twice she had peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no pictures or conversations in it, 'and what is the use of a book,' thought Alice, 'without pictures or conversations?'..."


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Draconiquus storytelling is the most remarkable, beautiful, immersive, and unexplainable experience you one can ever have in being told a story. It is in fact one of the top 100 abilities specific only to one particular species that are the most pleasurable to others around them.

What's so great about it? I'm glad you asked.

Draconiquus storytelling is unique in that the listener isn't stuck having to imagine everything going on in the story in their minds, for the sound of a draconiquus telling a story gives the listener a very unique sort of hallucination, in which allows one to believe they're actually seeing the events of the story play out in front of them. They see the story unfold as an observer following the main character(s) in everywhere they go, watching everything they do, as long as it is actually written about in the actual text. Even with seeing, hearing, and smelling all of the action that goes on in the story, they can still hear the voice of the Draconiquus as the narrator in the background, so not a single word in the narrative goes unheard.

This allows for the listener to become more emotionally involved in the story as a whole, as well. One who might be able to read a story with a sad ending by themselves and not shed a single tear, will be bawling their eyes out when the same story is read aloud to them by a draconiquus. Any feeling of happiness, anger, envy, hatred, awe, fear, bliss, etc., that the main character(s) feel, the listener feels just as much of said emotion as they do. They become more fond of the characters themselves. It is simply a beautiful emotional ride, that no other form of storytelling could ever manage to come anywhere close to.

If you ever become friends with a draconiquus, ask him/her to read you a story. Choose one of your own favorites, or let him/her read you one of his/hers. Believe me you will not regret it. You won't even care about how many hours you had spent in that hallucination, how many appointments you missed because of it. It will have been completely worth it!

Sadly, however, audio recordings of these readings seem to negate the hallucinogenic effects of hearing it in person, and so once the draconiquus finishes the story, the experience is lost forever except in memory.

This is how Twilight Sparkle experienced for the first time Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. She felt herself falling down the rabbit hole right next to Alice. She shrank and grew in size every time that Alice did. She smelled the fresh scents coming from all the plants that Alice went by. She was at a loss for words on how to describe the experience later on.

"That was... that was... amazing..." was all she could get out, after the story was over, and the hallucination wore off. "I've never heard of any kind of magic like that before! I'd love to be taught how to do that!"

"Sorry, Twilight. It's a kind of magic that only draconiquui have. Not chaos magic, necessarily, as it can be explained scientifically. The audio waves of a draconiquus voice have a very peculiar hallucinogenic compound inside them, in which, when they are reciting any kind of narrative, be it a short story, a novel, a poem, or a song, those who are around at the time to listen begin to believe that they're actually a third party witnessing the narrative take place before them. Well, I say third party rather loosely, because if the story is told in either first person or second person the listener takes on the role of the main character."

"What's second person?"

"It's when the story's main character has no name, because he/she is supposed to be the reader him/herself, the narrator will speak in second person by referring to the main character as 'you'."

"I've never read a book like that."

"I doubt you would have. Anyway, you are the first Equestrian pony in history to have heard this story. It just so happens that, at this point in time, the race who wrote this book have yet to make official extraterrestrial contact, but when they do, they begin to publish translated copies of their own works to many other planets of the world. It just so happens, that, three hundred years later, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carol became the second highest selling children's book of all time."

Twilight's jaw dropped in awe.

"Don't believe me, take a look for yourself." He opened the book to its copyright page, and pointed to where it said the following:

Original Publication: Earth year 1869 A.D. (393 years before first Equestria edition).

First Equestria Publication, Year 1242 C.R.

"But, this hasn't even been published yet! How could you even own this book?"

"Normal ponies do things in chronological order. I'm neither normal, nor pony."

"But that's impossible!"

L snapped his fingers, and an orange with a slice missing, and frog legs appeared on the table. "Oh look, an orange frog. Your argument is invalid."

The frog went ribbit.

"You change that frog back to normal at once!"

"I wasn't the one who made him like this in the first place."

A fruit fly flew close to what it thought was an ordinary orange, in hopes of a nice meal, completely oblivious to the fact that it was flying towards its bane.

"Oh, then who did?"

The frog shot out its tongue and reeled the fruit fly inside of him.

"Spoilers."

The frog began to hop across the table knocking over and smashing up the tea pots that L set out on it.

"Spoilers?"

"Okay, I'll make this easy for you to understand. I'm a time traveler, which is how I got that book that hasn't been published yet, and that is how I do things outside of chronological order. And when I answer a question with just the word 'Spoilers', that means that the answer is an event that happens in your future, and you have to find out for yourself in your own time. Telling you could cause the sort of chaos that even the draconiquui who lived back thousands of years ago strictly forbid." He proceeded to pick up the orange frog as it hopped his way. "But, I can tell you that sometime after this frog was turned into this, he (well, technically he's now an it, but I call it 'him' just so as to not be rude) has become my pet."

Twilight considered this for a moment. "Well, I guess they at least had some sense of order after all. So, you're a time traveler? What's time travel like? Does it hurt? Do I ever make a significant contribution to my species? No wait, that's a spoiler. What-"

L placed one long iguana digit on Twilight's mouth, which is universally known to mean "be quiet". Twilight wasn't even sure how it was physically possible for him to be doing this while still sitting in his seat.

"Yes, I'm a time traveler. Time travel is complicated. Chaotic, and very complicated. No, time travel itself doesn't hurt, but what you do in the past or future certainly can. And although I can tell you nearly nothing about it, I can, however, say that your own contribution to ponykind will be remembered forever. Let that be a very encouraging thought to remember in the future."

These last two sentences made Twilight happy. That was the most wonderful thing anypony had ever said to her at that point in time. Tears of joy began to form in her eyes.

And then a loud thump was heard upstairs, ruining the beautiful moment.


	4. Chapter 3

CHAPTER THREE

Twilight Sparkle jumped in surprise, and let out a yelp of fright. "Warn me next time you do something like that!" she yelled at him.

"I didn't do that," responded L.

"Then what was it?"

"Dunno. Shall we investigate?"

"No. Mother told me that whenever you hear a strange noise outside, or even in the house, don't go out and investigate it alone."

"But you won't be alone, Twilight. I'll be right there with you, I'll even go first if you wish."

"Really?"

"Really. Now, come on."

He led her to the stairs, up to the library tower. It is strange to know that, just like in her days in Ponyville, when she was a filly in Canterlot, she lived in the town library as well. Seems like it's true what they say: "the more things change, the more they stay the same."

When they got inside, they saw the devastation that had just occurred. There was a huge hole blown into a wall with a bookcase, spreading wood, books, pages and other debris all over the room, and a strange pod, which is apparently what had blast through the wall, had crashed landed onto the floor, making it bend downward. It was hot.

"What in Equestria did you do to this place!?" exclaimed Twilight.

"I didn't!" responded L, on the defensive.

"Did you at least know this was going to happen?"

"No."

"Great! You have a time machine, know so much about my future, and yet you didn't even know that my library was going to be destroyed on this night!"

"I'm sorry. But I didn't." He took a closer look, being careful not to get too close to it. "It looks like there's something inside it. Twilight, fetch me a bucket of water. Make it about eight buckets. I'm gonna cool this sucker off and get it open."

Twilight did as she was told, but she could only find one bucket, so she filled it, brought it up, had L splash the pod with it, and brought it back down, and repeated seven more times. It let out quite a lot of steam, but finally, it was cool enough to touch.

L pulled out a strange short silver rod with a blue tip from his inner coat pocket. He held it out to the door of the pod, and pressed a button. A high-pitched humming noise came from the rod, as he held it to a panel on the side. The door opened up with a soft hiss as pressure was released.

"What is that thing?" asked Twilight, referring to the rod that L was just about to re-pocket.

"A Sonic Screwdriver," he stated, more focused on what was inside the pod at the time. "And this looks like it is an egg. A dragon egg to be precise." He pulled a large light purple egg with darker purple polka-dots out of the pod. He took a moment to thoroughly investigate it. "I wonder," he said to himself.

He then noticed something else inside the cockpit. He gently set the egg down on the ground, and pulled the other object out of it. It was an envelope made of parchment paper with a single letter "L", written with a feather pen. He opened the envelope and read the single piece of parchment paper inside of it. Twilight never found out what was written in that letter, but whatever it was, it was making L on the verge of tears. When he was done reading it, he held the parchment paper to his chest, and a single tear fell from his left eye.

"What does it say?" asked Twilight, curiously.

L turned to her and simply said, "Spoilers."

"That again?"

"It's not good for one to know too much about their own destiny, Twilight. But, I will say this, I think you should keep that egg. Your whole future depends on it."

"How am I supposed to keep a dragon egg? What do I do when it hatches? How can I possibly take care of a giant, fire-breathing dragon?"

"He will start out as a baby, and it will take him hundreds of years for him to get to the size that you're thinking of. Also, they're only mean and dangerous because they're normally brought up not to know any better. You can bring him up to be less dragon-like and more pony-like. Your own mother did the same."

"What happened to her dragon?"

"It died in an accident. A terrible, stupid, chaotic accident. Which I had no part in." He added for good measure. "It will be different with him."

"You keep saying 'him', as though you know it's going to be a boy."

"I do." He stopped himself before he ended up giving an even bigger spoiler. "Don't ask me any more about it. Now let me get this library fixed up. He snapped his fingers, and the entire crash event happened in reverse. Every book, page, every splinter of wood and other debris went back to their proper place, while the pod flew back to wherever it came from. The only sign of it ever having been there was the egg still lying on the ground near Twilight's hooves.

Twilight was now going around, investigating the room, disbelieving that everything could have gone back exactly the way it was.

"I'll go find something for you to carry that egg downstairs with. I know you don't know levitation just yet, and it would be impossible for you to walk on two legs while holding onto something as delicate as an egg with the others. I'll be right back." He paused before going downstairs. "I'm certainly glad that this isn't a Grim Dark fic, otherwise those would have been terrible last words," he said to reader. The Narrator reminded him that he was not allowed under any circumstances to break the fourth wall like that. "Shut up, Narrator! I'll say whatever the hay I want!"

"Who are you talking to?" asked Twilight.

"Nopony important. See you in a few minutes." He went downstairs.

He came back up a few minutes later with a wicker basket, with a handle and a few cloths and a pillow inside, so as to form a sort of carrying nest. He set the basket next to the egg, picked up the egg, and placed it inside, resting the tip of the egg on the pillow, and wrapping a cloth on top of the base. "There you go, little guy," he said. "All nice and snug."

"He's an egg. He can't hear you."

"And how would you know? Have you ever been an egg?"

"Of course not!"

"I rest my case."

He picked up the basket, and led Twilight down the stairs, back to her living room. "You know, there were these scientists in some other planet who were doing these brainwave scans on an egg once. As the egg rolled of the table and fell to the ground, they managed to decipher a very clear thought out of its mind. The thought was: 'Oh, no. Not again.'... No, wait, that was bowl of petunias. Never mind."

"You're off your rocker!"

"And loving every minute of it!" He paused in front of the door. "Although the actual seconds are a bit dull." He opened the door and brought himself, the egg, and Twilight inside. "Now, um, I forgot to ask. What time are you supposed to be in bed tonight?"

"8:30."

L looked at the clock. It read 8:25. "Looks like we're going to be cutting it a bit close. It's time that you started getting ready for bed. Go on, brush your teeth, and whatever else you have to do, and get in it. But first, show me where your room is, so I can set this down on a desk or something."

They did all of this.

L went into Twilight's room, and tucked her in. He kissed her on the forehead. "Good night, Twilight Sparkle," he said, softly. She closed her eyes, as he walked to the light switch and switched it off. "And goodbye, my love," he added, under his breath, not realizing that Twilight had heard him, and would fall asleep pondering over these last four words.

This was only the first time Twilight had ever seen L. But it was the last time L would ever see her.


	5. Chapter 4

CHAPTER FOUR

Princess Twilight Sparkle woke up after having a very familiar dream. It was a dream that she remembered having repeatedly back when she was a little filly. In this dream, she had a foalsitter, who was a draconiquus, like Discord, and was responsible for giving her the very dragon egg that brought her number one assistant, Spike, into her life. But why was she having it again now, on this day in particular? The day before her wedding.

Tomorrow would be the happiest day of her life. The day that she would marry the pegasus stallion, Flash Sentry. It had been just over a year since she first met him. Or rather, she met his human parallel universe self, anyway. She was very excited for the big day.

Although she was still living in Ponyville, she and her friends were staying for a week in Canterlot Castle, preparing for the big day.

She got up from her bed and headed into the bathroom for a shower. After washing her mane and the rest of her body, she got out, and dried off. She then attempted to wake up her sleeping baby dragon, Spike. "Time to wake up, Spike," she said to him, while nudging his head with her muzzle.

Spike groaned in response.

An idea came to Twilight. "Spike! I'm making sapphire gemstone pancakes!"

Spike jumped out of his makeshift basket bed, with an eager grin on his face. "Oh boy! I'll have twelve!" The grin faded when he heard Twilight giggling, and he realized that he'd just been trolled.

"Come on, Spike. We only have today left until the big day, and we still have a lot to do beforehand." She and Spike went downstairs for breakfast.

They had a rather rushed breakfast, followed immediately by going over Twilight's checklist of everything needed to be done by that day's end. They visited Applejack in the kitchen, creating the baked goods (except for the cake, which was being delivered by Mr. and Mrs. Cake); Rainbow Dash, who, just like with Shining Armor's wedding, was practicing to perform a Sonic Rainboom as Twilight and Flash kissed; Rarity, who had just completed Twilight's wedding dress; and Fluttershy, who was having her birds practice to give the music for the event. Everything seemed to be going just perfect.

And then they checked on Pinkie Pie with the décor, and the day went downhill from there.

It wasn't that Pinkie had somehow managed to destroy the place, or any other disaster. No. It was due to what seemed like a rather odd bit of decoration that Twilight had noticed in the corner of the room. A decoration that gave her an unnerving feeling of déjà vu.

"Pinkie, what's with that blue box over there? It's not like you," she asked.

"I didn't put any blue box in here, Twilight," responded Pinkie Pie. "It just showed up there all of a sudden."

"Pinkie, What do you mean, it just showed up all of a sudden?"

"Well, there was this weird draft, and this weird noise, like" (this was followed by a silly, yet accurate imitation of the vwooomp vwooomp noise that the Tardis makes) "and then that box just appeared out of nowhere. And afterward somepony stepped out of it."

"Who, Pinkie? Who stepped out of it?"

As if, in answer to this question, a very familiar-looking draconiquus came into the room, heavily focused a very strange device, with a satellite dish attached to the end opposite of himself, that was constantly beeping. He walked forward towards Twilight and Pinkie, and slapped the device across the side, in frustration, exclaiming "Oh, you stupid thing!"

It was then that he looked up and noticed the two of them, standing there looking at him. "Ah. Hello, Princess Twilight Sparkle. And I take it that the other two are Pinkie Pie and Spike."

"Yes," responded Pinkie Pie.

"Hello, to both of you."

"You know, most ponies lose their imaginary friend while they are still fillies. You should have a medal for being persistent," Twilight Sparkle told L.

"I didn't! I still have mine!" exclaimed Pinkie. She then gestured to the air next to her. "Say hello, Homey Sompson."

There was silence from Homey Sompson.

"He says any imaginary friend of Twilight's is a friend of his!"

L waved at Sompson and gave him a thumbs up.

"Um, Twilight," said Spike. "He's not imaginary. I can see him, too."

"You can?" asked Twilight. "You mean, he was real all this time?"

"Apparently. What's his name?"

"That's just it, Spike. Unlike a real person, he doesn't even go by a name. Just an initial. I. No, was it J? Or T? Or-"

"L," said L.

"That's the one! L! He just goes by L!"

"When did you even meet him?" asked Spike.

"Don't expect me to answer that, Twilight," said L. "It hasn't happened for me yet. And don't say it either. I can't have any spoilers on my future events."

"What does he mean by that?"

"When I met him one night when my parents were away, he was my foalsitter for the night, and he told me that he was a time traveler, and that he knew quite a bit about my future, some of which has already come to pass. He showed up in that blue box over there. And he gave me the egg that became you, Spike. And then he- Would you please stop that?"

While Twilight was telling Spike and Pinkie what was obviously spoilers to him, he plugged his ears with his fingers, and was repeatedly saying: "La la la la la la la la..." He stopped, and said, "Sorry. One shouldn't know too much about future events. Even though you met me in the past, it is still the future for me. Don't say any more of it."

"Alright. Why are you here?"

"Because I had a certain tip that Queen Chrysalis is wanting revenge on you, and I figured that your wedding with Flash Sentry would be the most logical place and time in which she would do it. Basically, your brother's wedding fiasco all over again."


	6. Chapter 5

CHAPTER FIVE

Twilight's mouth hung open in shock. "You don't think that I'm Queen Chrysalis in disguise, do you?" she asked.

"Well, I have a way of finding out," he said. He showed her the beeping device. "This is my own invention. It is a radar built to track down anything with changeling DNA in them. A changeling may be able to change its own appearance into just about any other species, but their genetic structure remains the same. Pinkie, Spike, stand back. And don't worry, Twilight, it won't hurt you."

He held the device so that the radar dish was pointed directly at Twilight. The beeping slowed its pace. He stayed in that position for a moment and then said, "You're clean. No trace of changeling on you."

Pinkie and Spike sighed in relief. "Now I will have to check the other two, just to be safe," said L. That relief was so brief.

He scanned Spike next, and then he said: "He's clean. Needs a bath. But he's clean."

He then scanned Pinkie, and then exclaimed: "Pinkie! What the hay did you just do to my machine? It can't determine just what in the hay you even are! It's saying random species in which you clearly are not: Pikachu, vogon, Romulan, dog, dalek, Chuck Norris…"

"How could you think that I would do something like that?" exclaimed Pinkie. "I know that I'm a pony. Not a peek-a-boo, or a vogoth, or a momuin, or a dog, or a-"

"I get it. I believe you. The only reason I could think of in which it would be acting this way is if…"

"Is if, what?" asked Twilight, desperate to know what's going on.

"It's not important. What is important is that it proves she's not a changeling. Anyway, come, you three. Let's go track us down a changeling."

They searched for the signal throughout Canterlot, the signal seeming to get hot and cold at seemingly sporadic moments. Eventually they ended up in the Canterlot gardens, as it seemed that they were finally closing in on their target.

They were shocked to find that their target turned out to be a very familiar-looking bunny.

"There you are, Queen Chrysalis!" he said. "You look rather cute for a bunny, but I know you have no concept of cute. I am L, Equestria's secret time traveling protector, and I'm on to your plans for Princess Twilight and Flash. And you're just a normal bunny, aren't you?"

Angel Bunny nodded his head in annoyance, and then hopped off to join Fluttershy with the birds.

"Well, that just goes to prove it."

"Prove what?" asked Twilight.

"It proves that this damn thing doesn't work at all!" He tossed the changeling radar into the air behind him, intending to open a wormhole, to suck out of this universe, before it hit the ground and possibly hurt anypony.

Before it could reach the wormhole, however, an eagle claw reached out from behind a tree and caught it. "Oh, it's you," said the voice of the other draconiquus that Twilight and her friends knew.

L's face became grim. He turned around and came face to face with Discord stepping out from behind the tree that was too small for him to hide behind. "It's been a long time," he said.

"Indeed, it has," said Discord. "Yet it seems like it was only yesterday since our last meeting. Oh wait. It was! For you, anyway."

"Actually it was three months ago from my own chronology. How have you been?"

"I've been really busy being stone. You know, after you aided Celestia and Luna in finding the Elements of Harmony to use on me. Snitched about my secret to them, too."

"He did what?" exclaimed Pinkie Pie, now mad at L.

"What was I supposed to do? Stand back and watch them all go extinct because they worshipped somepony evil pretending to be a god? One who is in my clan's arch-enemy clan?"

"Pretending to be a god?" asked Twilight.

"I've reformed since then," stated Discord.

"And yet you still call yourself the Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony, and are still using the exact same alias as you had used before."

"You mean to say, he's not?" asked Spike.

"Let me make this easy on all of you. Discord and I are aliens from another world, all from the same species, the name of which is unpronounceable in any other language. But we are from enemy clans. The clans are all listed from A-Z, and each of them consist of exact duplicates of an original who went by the corresponding letter, all of them go by the letter of their clan, but some come up with aliases, like 'Discord' or 'John Smith'. One of their powers is the ability to change their form, depending on whatever alien species they're dealing with at the time. Discord is a Q. Qs use their powers to spread chaos and ruin to other worlds. I am, of course, an L. Ls use their powers to protect other words from chaos and ruin. That is the secret I revealed to Celestia and Luna two thousand years ago."

"Oh, my!" came a shy voice from behind a bush.

"Fluttershy, were you listening in on that?" asked Discord, suddenly concerned with what the only friend he'd ever had would now think of him.

"No," she said, sticking her head out from behind the bush. "I mean, yes. I mean, if you're okay with that." She ducked her head back behind the bush.

"So that's the Fluttershy I had heard so much about," said L.

" 'Heard so much about'? From who?" asked Twilight.

"Spoilers."

"That's just his way of saying, 'I heard about it from you in the future'," said Discord.

"Pretty much."

"Well, if what you two are saying is true," said Twilight, "then L has more respect from me than you do, Discord."

Discord frowned upon this statement.

"I've just thought of something," said L. "I'm supposed to be Equestria's ally, and I am the arch-nemesis of Discord, but Discord is being trained to be Equestria's ally, too. Does that make me Equestira's enemy now? I'd be so pissed at Celestia if it does, after all I did for her in the past!"

This question made Discord's head spin. Literally. In fact, it came unscrewed, and fell to the ground. "Oomph! Could one of you lend me a hoof?" he asked as his body began to kneel down to find his head.

L ran up to Discord, and kicked his head like a soccer ball straight out of the castle gardens, and it flew towards the castle and crashed through the window of Princess Luna's tower. This is, of course, an impossible feat. "Mother of Eris*, that hurt!" exclaimed Discord's head, as he landed on Luna's bed. The head rolled over to see Princess Luna standing there, glaring at him. He hesitated before saying, "Princess Luna, I can explain."

Discord would not find his body again for another few days, finding out that it had decided to take a train to the Crystal Empire for the weekend. He would later comment, "I always suspected my body had a mind of its own. I guess I was right."

Back in the castle gardens...

"I not sure why I just did that," admitted L, seeing everyone just staring at him, instead of the headless draconiquus walking off to the Canterlot train station.


	7. Chapter 6

CHAPTER SIX

They continued their search for the changeling, bringing Fluttershy along, despite her being frightened by the idea of being led by somepony the same species as Discord, or Q, as they now knew his true identity as, to find somepony even worse. They could be anypony in Canterlot.

Twilight suggested that they try to find Flash, logically deciding that, if the bride wasn't Queen Chrysalis, then most likely, it would be the groom. L agreed to this, so they tried to find him, deciding the first place to look would be in the palace.

They eventually did find Flash in one hallway, but what he was doing made Twilight gasp. He was with another Twilight, who was giving him a kiss, having him backed up against a wall.

"Flash! I'm not me! I mean, that's not me!" exclaimed the confused Twilight with L.

Flash Sentry's eyes glanced over to her, with a look which read: "What in the shiblamers?" Before Flash could get away from the fake Twilight, she pulled away from his muzzle, showed her changeling fangs, and bit him on the neck. "Ow," said Flash, in a very retarded tone, and fell to the ground.

Unlike his human counterpart, pegasus Flash Sentry was all muscle and no brains, which is the only reason he even got the job in the Royal Guard in the first place. He had nearly gotten fired after he arrested a child in a creepy mask for saying what he thought was an insult to his mummy. He often found himself unable to finish his sentences with proper words, and ends up speaking complete gibberish. It was the most improbable thing that Twilight would ever love somepony like that. In fact, it has now been discovered, that human Flash Sentry participated in an expensive science experiment, intended to increase the intelligence of retarded people, with a 1:2 rate of success. It succeeded for him, but in no way did it affect the Flash in Equestria. Bucking waifu stealer.

"Flash!" cried Twilight, running to him, worrying that changeling bites were poisonous.

The fake Twilight transformed into Queen Chrysalis.

"Wait hold on a second," said Pinkie Pie. "Last time you imprisoned Cadence in the Canterlot caves before taking on her form! Why didn't you do it this time around?"

"I was sneaking around putting on different disguises whenever guards showed up, looking for a place to hide in order to come out and kidnap you tonight, when Flash showed up, and I disguised as you by accident!" said Chrysalis. "Now my original plan is ruined, but my back up plan is now in effect!"

"Oh Chryssie-" said L.

"Nopony calls me 'Chryssie'!" exclaimed Chrysalis.

"- it's over. You've been found out. What plan do you think could possibly save your scheme now?"

"Twilight, I feel funny," said Flash.

"Funny?" cried Pinkie Pie. "I feel funny all the time! Funny's a good thing! I love feeling funny!"

"Funny, funny, how?" Twilight asked Flash.

"Oh, well, for one thing I have a strange sort of tingling sensation in my-" began Pinkie Pie, before everypony tuned her out.

"It feels like something is spreading through me from my neck," said Flash.

Twilight looked at the bite and saw his fur around it was beginning to blacken. "Are you poisoned?" she asked.

L went over to Flash, and pointed his sonic screwdriver at his neck, and scanned his bite. "No, he's not poisoned. He's mutating."

"Oooo," said Pinkie Pie. "Is he going to get special spider powers and start swinging around from webs and start fighting crime, and become the Spiderpony? Is he-"

L snapped his fingers, and Pinkie's mouth was gone. This was the third time in her life, since she met Twilight, that Pinkie has been unable to speak. "No offense, Pinkie," he said, "but shut up! There are times and places to be funny and silly, but this is not one of them."

"Tell me, L. What do you mean by mutating?" asked Twilight.

"It was said back in olden pony times: 'One bitten by a changeling, themself becomes a changeling, and become devoid of love.' Nightmare Moon wrote that one."

It is curious to note that, before Nightmare Moon was Princess Luna's evil alter ego bent on having nighttime last for all time, she was merely Princess Luna's pseudonym, writing grim works, such as Mommy, There's a Werepony in my Closet (a short story, which focused on the psychological aspects of being a little filly who imagines monsters in their room), that had been deemed too dark for the public's view of a ruler of Equestria to be writing. Over the time in which Luna was writing under this name, she began to come up with an idea of what her alias would have been like, if she were real. That idea later became reality, when she developed split-personality syndrome. Moon was also quite furious when she found out that she wasn't a real pony, and decided to make it nighttime for all time, because she was jealous of Celestia for being real.

"Oh, no!" cried Twilight. "Can't you do anything about it, L?"

"No," admitted L. "Only you two can. You have to fight it together with your love."

"What a sentimental, yet absurd statement," said Chrysalis, who is unable to love. She had a confident grin on her face.

"Oh, yeah?" said L. "Isn't that what you said last time?"

Chrissie's grin faltered.

"Oh, and before I forget, or you try to escape," said L to her, "there's something that you need to know. Something they have in my world that they don't have in Equestria."

"What's that?"

He got very close up to her. "Insecticide spray." He then whipped out a can and sprayed it into Chrysalis's face. She began to cough, and grow weak. She fell to the ground with her legs sticking up in the air. L then snapped his fingers and chains formed around her body, locking her limbs together.

"She's not dead," he told the others. "Despite what the label reads, this isn't insecticide." He held the can out, and peeled off a false Bug-Off label, to reveal that it was actually a can of spray-on deodorant. "Let's find out how long it takes her to realize she's not dead.

"But, anyway," he went back to Flash and Twilight. The blackness was spreading down his front right hoof. "What I need you to do, Flash, is to focus. Concentrate on your love for Twilight. Particularly a memory that shows it. One that is very strong. I have faith in you that you can do it."

"Do you know for a fact that this can save him?" asked Twilight.

"I believe in miracles," said L. "After all you've been through, don't you believe in them as well?"

Twilight reflected on every time before that any danger had come into her life, there had always been some sort of miracle that saved the day, when all hope seemed lost. Yes, she believed in miracles. One will happen again. It has to. It just has to.

Twilight held Flash's hoof in her own, and hoped for one.

"What are you thinking of Flash?" asked L, noticing that the blackness was still spreading.

"I'm thinking of the time in which I went to one of Pinkie's parties with her," he said. "She gave me the rest of my slice of cake, because I ended up getting such a small one by mistake."

"Try something stronger than that, Flash," said L.

"Twilight, do you remember that time we went to Cloudsdale together, and we ended up getting so lost, that we ended up having to stay outside in the cold. I stayed out there the whole time with you, trying to keep ourselves warm with each other's body heat? I actually gave up my half of the food we'd had on us so that you wouldn't starve."

"Um, no, actually," said Twilight. "I don't remember that at all."

"Huh, must have just been a dream then."

"Okay, the Changeling transformation is getting dangerously close to being completed," said L, noticing that one of Flash's pegasus wings had just become a changeling wing. "Find something strong quick, Flash."

Flash hesitated. "I can't. It's cold, so cold."

"We're losing him!" cried L.

"Flash, please don't give in! Please stay the way you are! Do it for me!"

"Mph mmhph mmimphuph!" attempted Pinkie Pie.

"Sorry, my love," was the last thing Flash said with the ability to love. Then he was a changeling. The transformation was complete.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" screamed Twilight, in tears.


	8. Chapter 7

CHAPTER SEVEN

Twilight screamed: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" as Flash Sentry's mutation into a changeling was completed.

"Yes! YES!" exclaimed Queen Chrysalis, pretending to be unconscious, as she knew she wasn't dying from the moment that L mentioned that he only sprayed deodorant on her. "Now, my newest loyal subject, bite her neck, make her one of us!"

Before changeling Flash could get his fangs close enough to the neck of the mare standing on top of him, L pushed her off him. "No, let me stay with him!" she cried, tears streaming down her face.

"You can't save him, Twilight!" he exclaimed, holding her back. "Run! Just run! Run from him!" He picked her up and ran while carrying her throughout the castle, away from the two changelings.

Changeling Flash began flapping his bug wings, making a buzzing sound, went into the air and was about to chase after them, when Chrissie yelled at Flash, "Stop! Get me out of these first!" Flash flew down to her, and, using his newly grown changeling horn, he sliced open the ropes bonding her. They both then flew off after them.

"Um, excuse me, L," said Fluttershy, going as fast as she could bring herself to go.

"Yes?" asked L.

"I don't mean to interrupt..."

"You're not."

"... or to give Twilight something worse to think about through all of this, but..."

"Do get on with it, Fluttershy. What is it? It sounds important."

"Oh, well, I've never gotten a reaction like that from anypony when I try to inform them of something important before."

"That can't be what you were going to tell us."

"No, it isn't."

"Then what is it?"

"Well, they're changelings, right?"

"That's correct."

"Couldn't they just-"

"Hey, I just realized something," said Twilight, still crying. "Because they're changelings, they can be anyone inside this castle! By leaving then and there, we no longer know who's a changeling and who isn't!"

"That's what I was just going to say," said Fluttershy. "It happens every time."

"Don't worry, all of you," said L. "Although we won't know who Flash is, we will know who Chrysalis is. I've made sure of it."

"How could you have done that?" asked Spike.

"You'll see."

"MMmph mmmurmp mmhmhhhpmm?" asked Pinkie.

L was just about to respond by giving Pinkie back her mouth, when the whole group ran into Changeling Flash disguised as Flash Sentry, along with an undisguised Queen Chrysalis standing next to him. Apparently, while L, Twilight, Pinkie, Spike, and Fluttershy were fleeing from them, Flash and Chrysalis had gone around and captured Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Applejack, and were now holding them as hostages, covering their mouths.

"Surrender now," said Chrysalis, "or we will make all three of them into changelings right now."

"Noooo!" cried Twilight.

"No," said L, pulling out from his coat a strange pastry with a red jelly center exposed. Twilight and the others were looking at him, wondering just what he was thinking, as he held it out to the changelings. "This is my Tardis self-destruct button. My Tardis just so happens to be inside Canterlot Castle at this very moment, down in the ballroom. The explosion it will produce will also blow up all of Canterlot and half of the mountain it rests on. You let them go, or I push this button and we all go up in flames."

"Whaaaaaat?" exclaimed the others all at once.

"You're completely mad!" exclaimed Twilight.

"That's a good thing, too. Otherwise this plan would probably never work."

"You'd destroy us all, just to save these three?" asked Chrysalis.

"You bet your ugly abdomen, I will, Chryssie!" exclaimed L.

"Nopony-!"

"-calls you 'Chryssie'. Yes, I heard you the first time. I'd stop calling you 'Chryssie', but 'Chryssie' is so much catchier, simpler, easier to spell, easier to remember, and far more easier to pronounce than 'Chrysalis' ever will be. Why don't you think so, Chryssie?"

"STOP CALLING ME THAT AT ONCE, YOU INFEDEL!" she demanded.

"No, Chryssie," he said with a smug look on his face. He was getting off on how she was reacting to that nickname. "Chryssie Chryssie Chryssie."

Chrysalis flung herself in the air, preparing to charge herself at L with the intentions to beat him to a pulp.

"Nuh-uh-uh," said L, holding out the pastry/button in front of her. "Get any closer to me and I swear I will use it."

Chrysalis flew back down, and said, "So what are your conditions to make sure you won't?"

"Release your one hostage, and I will not use it," he said simply.

"One hostage?" asked Chryssie. "I had three last time I checked."

"Not anymore you don't. During that little flight of anger, you allowed two of them to escape, Chryssie."

Just as L said it, Chrysalis and Changeling Flash were surprised to find that she was no longer holding a tight grip on Rainbow Dash and Applejack. Flash was even more surprised when Rainbow Dash tackled him to the ground, making him release Rarity from his grasp, and then Applejack joined in the fight.

"Your choice was made for you, Chryssie, it seems," said L. "I guess I won't have to use the Tardis self-destruct button."

"Pardon me for asking, darling, but how could that cookie possibly blow us all to horrible teeny tiny bits?" asked Rarity. "I mean, I know you're a draconiquus, but…"

"It's a cookie?" asked Chrysalis.

"Uh-oh," said L.

"Oh, dear," said Fluttershy. "Rarity, I don't think he wanted them to know that it was a cookie."

L gave a nervous laugh. "You don't say!" he said. He took a bite of it. "Alright, it's a Jimmy Dodger, and not dangerous at all. It was a lie. A clever lie. It was worth a shot, though."

"GET THEM!" exclaimed Chryssie.

A bunch of changelings jumped into the room through a window, and attempted to grab a hold of them, but instead the fighting ensues. Next thing everypony knows, there was a whole bunch of everypony, who was in the room, in the room.

About twelve Applejacks bucked each other in the face at once.

Five Rainbow Dashes were inching their way towards two frightened Fluttershys with the intent to pounce and attack.

Four Raritys were hitting on four Spikes (they all fell for it).

Eight Pinkie Pies were firing their party cannons at each other, needlessly redecorating the place and themselves.

Ten Twilight Sparkles were trying to find out which one was the smarter one, by reciting equations with irrational numbers as their solutions.

The only draconiquus L found himself face to face with seven different ponified versions of himself. "You guys should be ashamed to call yourselves changelings!" the draconiquus L told them. The pony Ls looked down at the floor in shame.

Only Queen Chrysalis herself was unchanged, but she herself wasn't sure why she wasn't. She was perfectly able to the last time she checked. But for some reason she found herself unable to. She had been wondering about that, but now had some idea as to who was responsible for her lack of being able to change.

It was then that Princess Celestia and Princess Luna walked into the room, and the chaos came to a halt. "What in Equestria is going on here?" asked Celestia. "Oh Faust! L, is that you?"

"You know him?" asked all of the Pinkie Pies, Twilight Sparkles, Rainbow Dashes, Raritys, Fluttershys, Applejacks, Spikes, and pony Ls.

"Well, of course I know him," she responded. "He's only just the best ally we have in keeping our planet safe from outside forces. I've met him quite a few times before, but not in the order that he meets me, unfortunately. Before we get any further, L, what is going on here?"

L pointed to Queen Chrysalis.

"Oh, not you again," both her and Luna said aloud.


End file.
